People with high IQs are not necessarily good at relating to other people, because inter-personal relationships require a different form of intelligence. There has been much recent literature about emotional intelligence; now Steve Saccone has written a book entitled Relational Intelligence: How Leaders Can Expand Their Influence Through a New Way of Being Smart, with a matching test available on the website www.relationalintelligence.info.
According to Steve, there are six defining roles of a relational genius. The Story Collector is someone who can draw out other people’s stories. The Energy Carrier knows how to enliven the mood in a room. The Compelling Relator knows how to get people interested. The Conversational Futurist knows how to use a conversation to create change. The Likeable Hero establishes authentic connections that make people feel valued. The Disproportionate Investor invests time and resources into a few carefully chosen people.
It seems to me that the online self-assessment, while thought-provoking, suffers from a problem common to many self-assessment tests: the relationally unintelligent person is likely to rate himself too highly, and thereby achieve a higher score than he deserves, because he is unaware of his own deficiencies. Nonetheless, the book provides interesting insights and should be useful for most people who have leadership responsibilities in a church.